Subject: I found some humor here for those who like to chuckle at Windoze '95...
From: Alan Lloyd <[email-masked]>
To: [email-masked]
Date: Wed, 10 Jan 1996 09:13:44 -0600

I found some humor here for those who like to chuckle at Windoze '95...

(the file is in an attachment...#*$&^#$&% GroupWise!)

------------------- WIN-95.TXT follows --------------------

I just got the latest listing of Windoze errors and though some of you might find it useful:

Recently the following undocumented Windows 95 error-codes were found.
Microsoft forgot to explain them in the manuals, so they will be spread via the Internet:

 -------------
WinErr: 001 Windows loaded - System in danger
WinErr: 002 No Error - Yet
WinErr: 003 Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file
WinErr: 004 Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong
WinErr: 005 Multitasking attempted - System confused
WinErr: 006 Malicious error - Desqview found on drive
WinErr: 007 System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware
WinErr: 008 Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments
WinErr: 009 Horrible bug encountered - God knows what has happened
WinErr: 00A Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full
WinErr: 00B Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB
WinErr: 00C Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! More!
WinErr: 00D Window closed - Do not look outside
WinErr: 00E Window open - Do not look inside
WinErr: 00F Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened
WinErr: 010 Reserved for future mistakes by our developers
WinErr: 013 Unexpected error - Huh ?
WinErr: 014 Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of.
WinErr: 018 Unrecoverable error - System has been destroyed. Buy a new
            one. Old Windows licence is not valid anymore.
WinErr: 019 User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not!
WinErr: 01A Operating system overwritten - Please reinstall all your
            software. We are terribly sorry.
WinErr: 01B Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error. Next
            time you will get a penalty for that.
WinErr: 01C Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate.
WinErr: 01D System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code.
WinErr: 01E Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait.
WinErr: 020 Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost.
WinErr: 042 Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box. The
            virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will automatically
            be closed and the virus will be activated again.
WinErr: 079 Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed.
            Please click the left mouse button to continue.
WinErr: 103 Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered.
            Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded.
WinErr: 678 This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play
            another game?
WinErr: 683 Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the
            system to complete boot procedure.
WinErr: 625 Working Error - The system has been working perfectly for the
            past ten minutes
WniErr: 902 Screen Error - The system is working perfectly, I'm not
            lying, your monitor is wrong
WinErr: 72a Crucial Halt - Hang on, WHAT was that?
WinErr: 72b Memory Error - What? Tell me again.
WinErr: 39c Disk Error in drive a: - Although your disk is in perfect
            condition (I just formatted it), I don't like it any more
WinErr: 983 Hard Disk Error - The files on the hard disk were neatly
            arranged and fully optimised, so I had to mess them up and put
            a couple of hundred .TMP files all over the place
WinErr: 294 BlackMail Error - $500 to Gates or your computer gets screwed
Winerr: 294b BlackMail Error - $500 to Gates or I'll show your wife the
             JPG's you just downloaded